The Road to 2020 - Grace Nyasulu
IF I was to define 2019 I would say 2019 was breath taking. When I say breath taking I mean it in both angles, the good and the bad. It was breath taking in a way that I felt like I was suffocating and shocking from my own decisions, choices and plans. It was also breath taking in a way that I did not know what was next for me, where I was going. Well, I was broken, I failed a couple of times and I fell also and regardless of all this God kept showing up reminding that this journey was not mine to stress on, so we had to get up, heal and I can happily say I overcame. I have learnt a lot of lessons which I will happily share.
- TOTALLY TRUST IN GOD.
I know trusting God sounds so cool and easy to do until you are put in a position where the only thing that is remaining is trusting in a future, a plan, a vision and a purpose you are not so sure of but just trusting the one that can actually fulfil those plans for you according to his will.
Proverbs 3 verse 5 says trust the lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding but acknowledge him in all you do and he will direct your path. I partially trusted God and in a couple of different situations I tried to fit in Gods shoes and try to make some things to work for me, oh well most of them the end was a disaster. Sometimes I thought how I felt at that moment was enough reason to settle for something. After being broken a couple of times I learnt to totally trust in God and his promises.
- OWN YOUR DECISIONS
You know with life it is easy to let the other person look bad, to be the wrong one and it is very easy to make the other person take the blame for the things that did not go the way you thought they would. I usually give the example of Adam and Eve. When God asked Adam of what he had done he blamed Eve and Eve later blamed the snake, but if we read the story no one was forced, all actions were based on their free will and their desire to know what they did not know. I have learnt to own my decisions, accept them, ask for guidance and learn from them. Spending time trying to blame someone for the relationship that did not work, the business that failed and the exams that you did not do well will robe you of the lessons that God wanted you to take from that situation. Yes that was not the right decision you made but love yourself enough to forgive yourself for doing and saying something out of your own selfish will and ambition. I have learnt that to really heal and forgive someone I have to love and forgive myself first.
- I AM WORTH OF A NEW START
There are some moments that I write words for others when in real sense God is communicating something to me as well. I am worth of starting all over and building that which I have always desired to build. I tell people it is never too late to redeem what you thought you might have lost, that passion to reach out to people, that business plan that has been in your mind for years it is never late for a new beginning. There are many times in my life that a new day, month and year did not feel like something new and beautiful is about to happen in my life, some days felt like the continuation of the yesterday and it was so burdening because I would ask God that you said joy comes in the morning how come my joy has not manifested yet.
Some moments I felt like I was not worth it, that my worth was lost because of what someone said to me, how someone judged and misinterpreted my decisions and choices. I had felt not worth because of the number of times I had failed and had been rejected in all possible ways.
I have learnt that rejection of any form is not always a negative thing though at the moment you experience it you question your identity and worth, this is because most times we equate rejection to the measure of our worth. Rejection is all about capacity. Not every one has the values, wisdom or even the vision to receive the fullness of who you are. I have learnt to let go of some things that are not for me and I have seen God steer me away from people, opportunities and things that may shift me from my true purpose. Rejection on its own sounds like a curse word but in most times rejection is not against you it is actually working for you.
Through the year, in the depressing times, the good times, the okay times and even the days I can describe as my best days I have learnt that true confidence is not rooted in what can be shaken because friendships, relationships and families will shake. It is not built upon feelings and emotions because these surely change depending on circumstances. In my life I have got confident in the knowledge of Gods love for me, that regardless of how far I stray from him, how broken or bruised I got that he has never left and his love has never changed. I have embraced his word that says all things; the ugly, the bad, the good are all working together for me because I love him and I am called according to his purpose. And I do believe it is the same for you.
Regardless of what life throws at you, keep planting seeds of love, kindness, forgiveness, hope, keep sowing and knowing that you haven’t missed on what was meant for you and know that beautiful things surely take time and that’s okay.
So, keep that dream, make it work, know God even more and trust him enough to let go of the things that are keeping you from moving forward in your purpose.
Happy Holidays, remember Christ is the reason for the season.